Getting to good

It's been a great morning. Beautiful sunrise. Amazing workout at the gym. Connected with my sister and laughed with delight. Why is it, then, that the only thing I can think about is how I apparently aggravated the Barrista at my favorite Starbucks? For two pumps of vanilla syrup, I'm letting my great day hit the skids. What happened to all of that good stuff of the past three hours? Well, I'm giving into my negativity bias -- and neuropsychologist, Rick Hanson, would say that I'm in good (at least plentiful) company in my ability to feel badly.

According to a paper by researchers from Case Western Reserve University and published in the Review of General Psychology in 2001, we evolved to be particularly attuned to (and apparently to obsess about) the negative in our lives. From the earliest days of man, the ability to keen in on the bad (threatening, negative) was important to survival. After all, it was more important to be tuned in to the saber tooth tiger about to pounce, than to the beauty of a newly blossomed flower or a bird's sweet song -- but make that flying thing a pterodactyl and we were on alert! That negativity bias -- tendency to focus on the bad-- persists today and oftentimes obscures the good.

Let's face it, in our lives most of us truly experience more good than bad. Still, it can be a challenge to maintain a balance, let alone "get to good" when that one negative occurs. And, are you ready for it? Here's the GOOD news: it can be done. You can train your brain to recognize the good. You can rewire to positive. How? By taking time to fully experience the good. Make a practice of recognizing and appreciating the good with intention. I often recommend to clients that they start with an appreciation journal and simply recall at the end of each day three positive things for that day. They don't have to be big things (after all, little bad things certainly make an impact -- recall my coffee experience), they simply have to be recalled, then savored. A smile from a stranger. Finding my favorite fresh figs at the market. Flipping the perfect omelet. Little, and good. And of course, there are those hugely positive events too. Whatever they are, intentionally recognize them. choose to give the positive as much attention as you give to the negative. Start to sensitize your brain to the good. Look for the good -- remembering that we move in the direction we look.

Nature or nurture, indeed -- evolution is only part of the story. When we intentionally invite and recognize the positive, we can get to good.

Now, can we make that a triple, two-pump, non-fat , extra hot . . . extra happy latte, please?